“Grinding the ax” 1 “acknowledgement”

*Authors note* This series originally posted on “Alabaster Breaking”, my sister site, that no longer exists. I found it very difficult to maintain both sites and just transferred those posts to this, my main site. Thank you

2 Peter 2:19 (a): “For of whom a man (person) is overcome, of the same is he brought in bondage.”

So many women either are there, have been there, and done that, and keep going back and doing it again, and again.

Why do so many have problems with this issue?

This does cross-reference to sin but it can apply to many situations in life. And that is exactly what I am using it for.

Domestic violence and unhealthy relationships that so many get trapped in and KEEP getting trapped in.

The psychology behind all this is truly mind numbing, you could study it from every possible angle and condition and still never truly understand what makes people evil or what makes people stay in relationships with evil people.

But Biblically, we have EXTREMELY clear answers but as we know often these answers have been twisted through the years to fit into a religious male agenda.

And I am not saying all Christian guys, pastors, or teachers hold these views. FAR FROM IT, but the ones who have held those views, more so in the days of old have more than damaged the cause for women’s rights and equality.

Women are destroying themselves, staying in theses relationships, allowing these false beliefs and false views on what they should be, need to be, and especially are expected of God to be.

This is such a double-edged sword topic because I know of a certainty many women who are feminists want NOTHING to do with God because of these falsely taught beliefs and then others suffer in these relationship because they BELIEVE God expects them too.

And it is ALL wrong, wrong, and wrong!

And after “refreshing” my brain with the new stats, obviously whatever we are doing as a society is NOT working.

Common knowledge abusers often came from home of abuse. Men who as children saw their mothers abused by their fathers. Women who as children witnessing the abuse of their mothers.

And everyone growing up with all the wiring and all the wrong data being programmed into them and when they are faced with the same situation later in life that default reaction takes over.

Not always, but often and you can trace the “target” on one’s head that attracts predators to some other traumatic event, but nevertheless, it is still a target.

Here’s some stats: The leading cause of injuries for women in the United States is abuse, to the tune of around slightly over four billion dollars a year being spent on medical costs of those abuse.

Every nine seconds a woman is beaten or assaulted.

Worldwide, one in three women are beaten or coerced into sex or other forced activity. 

Threats or threatened suicide by their boyfriend affect one in five teenaged girls.

One in four women suffer violent attacks at least once in their lifetime, usually before the age of twenty-five.

One in ten women are raped by their partners. Men who beat their partners and ALSO beat their children are a staggering sixty-two percent.

And pets are also usually victimized. {which should be an easy one, IF a guy hurts you, he sure as Hades isn’t going to care who else he hurts, ESPECIALLY someone you love, these people ARE evil and we must realize that}

And for the record, if you are in one of these relationships, as the adult, it is your responsibility to not only get yourself out of this relationship but you are the ONLY way of getting the children, pets, and whoever else that may be vulnerable and unable to take action for themselves, out of harm’s way. These people are not going to change, until they want to change and  there is NO SUCH THING as toughing it out for the children.

As the Bible states, Proverbs 22:6: “Train up a child in the way he should go, and (even) when HE IS OLD, HE WILL NOT DEPART FROM IT.”

It does not matter what school or society teaches, what shapes all of us is what OUR parents teach us and what we learn in our own homes. And that can take a lifetime to overcome if it is not the RIGHT teachings and how to correctly, respectfully interact with one another.

They are being damaged with every passing moment they are subjected to this dysfunctional lifestyle and if you want your son to grow up to batter the women in his life  just keep letting him to see his father or any man beat you.

And if you want to almost guarantee your daughter to be someone’s future punching bag then keep allowing her to see you beaten and verbally abused and YOUR responses in taking him back time after time after time and trying to hold it all together with the age old excuse “He doesn’t mean it”, or “He loves us in his own way.” 

He does MEAN it and He does not love anyone but himself.

I am sorry but NO ONE NEEDS ANY ONE SO MUCH THAT THEY WILL LITERALLY RISK THEIR LIVES RATHER THAN GET OUT OF THAT RELATIONSHIP.

 Love does not hit and love should never hurt.(but we’ll get into what the Bible teaches on that in a following post in this series) loneliness, fear, not being “able to make it without them” are not valid excuses, and I did say excuse because we have to quit making excuses for them, that’s why we have an epidemic.

Would you not want protection from a stranger that just walked up to you and beat you senseless?

Would you not want that person prosecuted so that he could not hurt anyone else? There is NO difference, the only difference is the difference we make in justifying it.  

Men whose fathers abused their mothers have double the rate of abusing women. Women are not always the victim of a father, husband, or boyfriend.

Talk about “friends like that…” fifty three percent of rapes are committed against women by their “friends”.

 Thirty-six percent of women who have reported aggravated assaults have been assaulted by their “friends”.

And twenty-two percent of  the women who are murdered are murdered by their “friends”. 

It’s not just family, and friends, twenty-four percent of stalking victims are stalked by acquaintances and thirteen percent are stalked by complete strangers.

Even with all these truly horrific numbers the most terrifying thought is that we allow it. 

 We allow it individually and we allow it as a society and  women who have been subjected to  a lifetime of abuse, often going from growing up with an abusive father, marrying an abusive husband, or dating abusive men, (often the same kind of man, over and over) and finally finding themselves in a place of hopelessness with no self-esteem, riddled with false guilt and false shame trapped in a prison of the mind. And I want to show you through this series that God does NOT want that for you.

And for other women, even after overcoming the original bondage of abuse, still become entangled in other relationships and self depreciating patterns that are just as deadly and just as damaging to the soul. 

But hopefully this is a “thinking point” and if you are in this situation, please get out and I know that is sometimes easier said than done. But get out and allow Jesus to start that healing process and again we’ll get into a lot of Bible teachings about how God WANTS you to be treated and believe me it is with the highest love, respect, and absolutely cherished.

And we’ll look at how trying to live with damaged souls, not dealing with that damage, only lead us to more snares and pitfalls.

And explain the title a little better.

Information taken from below listed sources and I encourage for more information to check out these sites and learn more, especially the warning signs that you could be in a dangerous relationship. Please join me next time and until then please check out the song below. Our ONLY peace…..

Εξυπνιζω NBJ 2017

To read this entire series:

“Grinding the ax” 2… “Real Love?”

“Grinding the ax” #3 “Anger Danger”

“Grinding the ax” #4 “STRANGLE HOLD”

Information taken from the following sources:

domestic violence statics .org

ace treatment centers.org 

ending stalking in america (esia). org

There are countless resources on this subject.